Journal Entries from Last Year

Most of you probably don't know that I actually had a pregnancy journal for Jillian, too. There was a period from February to May that's missing, but the whole first and most of the second trimester is there. I figured that I'd start posting some of those entries here so I can get them all on the same blog, know what I mean?

So these are entries from last November:

11/10/2005 :: Well... here we go again!
Excited
I'm shocked. Literally shocked. Mark and I were using FAM (charting) again, and I had such a weird cycle. Usually, my cycles are around 32 days long, and I usually ovulate around cycle day 18. This month, my temps were staying low, around 97.7 degrees (meaning no ovulation), WAY past 18 DPO (days past ovulation), so to be honest with you, I thought that the battery in my thermometer was dying. I even stopped temping for about a week and went out and bought a new thermometer! Mark and I...um... cough, cough... weren't that careful... {{blushing}} on October 27th, since I was on cycle day thirty-something and I figured I was either going to have an anovulatory cycle or I had already ovulated that month. So imagine my surprise when I started temping again on Halloween morning, I had an above coverline temperature!! YIKES!!

I figured the chances were still pretty slim that I was pregnant, though, because we had... um... goofed... 4 days before ovulating. Yikes.

Fast forward to today. I took a pregnancy test around 4:00, at the arm-twisting of Brittany and Christy (my online friends), and casually left it on the bathroom sink since I was SURE that it would be negative. About 10 minutes later I went to look and saw the big ol' PREGNANT on the screen. I swear I almost had a heart attack. I called Mark at work and asked him if he was sitting down. His exact words were, "Well....... shit.... oh boy... shit." LOL! Don't get me wrong... I am thrilled and so is Mark, but the timing is just a little off. Matt will be 18 months old when the baby is born. I'm just dazed. It's sad when you call the OB's office and even they are shocked when you tell them you took a pregnancy test and it's positive. They still remembered me! LOL! I have an appointment on Monday at 3:15.


11/11/2005:: Veteran's Day... worries are setting in...
None, or other
It's weird, I have the most mundane worries in my head. I'm worried that I'm going to be sick the entire 9 months again, I'm worried that all my maternity clothes are winter clothes (for the most part) and this time I'm due in the dead of summer, so I'll have to get new clothes... same goes for baby clothes... all my newborn stuff is winter stuff.

I'm wondering where we're going to move the desk and bookcases from the current office to make the new baby's room. I'm worried that Matt is getting the short end of the stick... he'll really be still a baby when the new baby comes. Will he suffer from less attention? Will he wake up every time the baby wakes up? How am I going to be able to get them both down for a nap at the same times? How am I ever going to have time to take a shower?? LOL! How am I going to be able to continue to work from home with two little ones? For that matter, how are we going to AFFORD two little ones? Are we going to have to buy another crib, because Matt will only be 1 1/2 years old and still too small for a bed.

So, as you can see, I didn't get much sleep last night. LOL. That and the fact that someone up in heaven must have been looking down at our family and laughing hysterically, because the night I got positive pregnancy test was the night Matt decided he needed to freak out for some reason. Poor little man must have ate something that didn't agree with him, because he has diarrhea and a wicked diaper rash. He was awake, screaming, from around 10:00 - 12:00, then from 5:00 - 5:30. We were at a complete loss for what to do. He didn't want to be rocked, he refused the bottle several times, took a sip or two of water and started crying again, we gave him gas drops, Tylenol... changed his diaper and put Balmex on several times... he finally just cried himself to sleep. :(

Mark and I were talking about it and we decided to (*TRY*) to keep the pregnancy a secret until Christmas Eve, when we'll tell both of our families at the same time. That meant that I had to call my mom and tell her a bold faced lie last night. I am a HORRIBLE liar, too. She knew about my crazy cycle and that I was "late." Luckily when I called my Dad answered and told me that my mom was out, so I just told him to tell her that "Dot arrived." He was thoroughly confused, of course, so I had to {{blushing}} tell him that I was late, but had just started my period and to pass the message on to mom. You all know me, I am HORRIBLE at keeping secrets, so we'll see how this goes. LOL.


11/13/2005 :: Amherst
None, or other
We went to Amherst, MA with our good friends Roni and Bryan today. Matt stayed with Aunty Michelle and Co. Roni is also expecting, and due May 12th. I was majorly carsick, but I think I hid it pretty well, considering. :) When we got back, we ate some dinner at Michelle and Paul's, and Mom and Dad were there, too. It was SO tough not saying anything, especially when out of the blue Michelle said, "Ryan, don't you think it's time for Aunty Kelly to have another baby?" I must have been beet red. I couldn't believe she said that!! She must have some sort of sixth sense.


11/14/2005 :: First appointment
None, or other
I had my OB appointment today at 3:15... it went well. They were all shocked to see me. I peed in a cup (I'm an expert at that now), and they told me that I was, indeed, pregnant. It was so surreal - they put me in the same exact room I was in when the doctor made the decision to induce me! The doctor told me my due date, based on my LMP, is July 3rd. I told her I wasn't so sure because I chart and I think I ovulated as late as Oct. 31st, which would make my due date July 24th, so she agreed to do an ultrasound to date the pregnancy. So I have to go back tomorrow at 8:30.


11/15/2005 :: Ultrasound
Scared
I just got back from my appointment. They did an internal ultrasound and the ultrasound tech said that my date is right on, due to the fact that it was way too early for her to see anything. My endometrium (sp?) is thickened, which means that things are happening, but it was too early to even see a yolk sac or anything. So I have another appointment on Dec. 2nd for another ultrasound. hehe... it makes me secretly happy to know that I was right and the OB was wrong about my due date. But, unfortunately, the panic has officially set in. Stupid, stupid me went and looked up examples of ultrasounds at 4 weeks, and found ones that there was obviously a sac and a baby. Now I'm wondering why, if I really am 4 weeks, we didn't see anything today??? I mean, I FEEL pregnant. I'm hungry all the time, sleeping poorly, and I even felt nauseous this morning. Sigh... I hate this stage of not-knowing at the beginning of pregnancy.


11/16/2005 :: A girl?
None, or other
According to the Chinese Lunar Calendar, and according to the Shettles Method, I'm having a girl. LOL! The Shettles Theory is that boy spermies swim faster, and girl spermies swim slower, but have more indurance (think of the boy sperm as the hare and the girl sperm as the tortoise. LOL!) So if you... um... DTD (do the deed)... closer to ovulation, the boys have a better chance of beating out the girls, but the further from ovulation you DTD, the more chances you have of having a girl because the boys'll swim fast and die out waiting for the ol' egg to appear. Get it? Or did I thoroughly confuse you?


11/17/2005 :: Panic!!
Scared
WHY do doctor's offices do this??? I went to my mom's for supper this afternoon and just got home and there's this message on my answering machine (I know it by heart because I listened to it three times): "Hi Kelly, it's Gerry from Dr. Lemonnier's office. Please call the office at..." What the hell do they want??? I'm shaking over here, and of course Mark's not home and my parents don't know yet, so my imagination is running away with me and I have no one to talk to... Did my pap smear show up something abnormal? Are they concerned that nothing showed up on the ultrasound the other day?? Did the ultrasound tech see something wrong that she didn't/couldn't tell me about?? Was there something wrong with the blood draw I had done today?? I'm never going to be able to sleep tonight. I'm so freakin' worried. I keep trying to tell myself that maybe they just need me to reschedule my appointment or something... but of course my mind keeps going to the worst scenarios.


11/18/2005 :: Sigh...
None, or other
Well, just got off the phone with the Doctor's office. Basically it's what I thought... they were concerned that nothing showed up on the ultrasound so they want me to get my HCG blood levels checked every two days and want to bump my ultrasound up to this Tuesday, with an appointment with the nurse practitioner right after. I know that I shouldn't be worried, they're just doing it to be cautious... but my pregnancy hormones are getting the best of me. What sucks is that if they would just trust me that I ovulated on Oct. 31st, then it would make sense that you can't see anything on the ultrasound. But I guess they need to do what they need to do. And at least I can put my mind at ease sooner once I hear what my levels are... Right???


11/18/2005 :: Relieved, yet annoyed...
Raging Hormonal
I just got home... I called the OB office and they said that my levels "were more in the four-week range." They wouldn't give me exact numbers and basically told me (in not so many words) not to call again for my levels and they'd discuss the results in the office on Tuesday. I'm really kind of annoyed with them. First of all, IF THEY HAD LISTENED TO ME in the first place, they would know that OF COURSE my levels are more in the four-week range!!! I'm only 4 weeks, 4 days right now! I ovulated on October 31st... 2 1/2 weeks ago. And, why won't they give me the exact numbers, and why don't they want me to call the office for my next results on Monday? I'm VERY relieved, but now that the worrying is (sort of) over, as you can see I'm getting kind of pissed. Sorry for venting...


11/22/2005 :: Smug
None, or other
Ha! :) Just got home from my appointment. i'm exactly 5 weeks pregnant. I felt like yelling out 'I told you so!' to the whole office. hehe!! The thing is, I went into the ultrasound and the tech said, 'what are you doing back here so early? I didn't want to see you for another 2 weeks at least! I explained how they called me last week and were concerned that they didn't see anything on the ultrasound and she kind of rolled her eyes and said, 'of course we didn't see anything, it was too early.' I said I know, I know... what are ya going to do? She looked for the results of my Hcg's and couldn't find them in my chart, so she asked me when I had gotten the blood drawn and I told her friday, yesterday and this morning... and she told me that the results probably weren't in yet... which kind of annoyed me because if the results weren't in, who the heck told me on friday that my results were 'more in the 4 week range'?!

But anywho, she said that with no results to go by, not to be disappointed if we still didn't see anything today. I told her that I wouldn't be disappointed at all because I know how far along I am. She winked and said good. :) So she did another internal ultrasound and lo and behold, there was a sac and a little yoke sac inside. It looked like a lima bean with a pea inside it, basically. She said that's exactly what a 5 week ultrasound should look like. :) She wants me to come back in a couple of weeks and i'll be able to see the baby and hear the heartbeat at that point. Yay! Hopefully I'll get a couple of pics at that appointment, too.

After the ultrasound, I met with the nurse practitioner and she also wondered why the heck the doctor was so worried. She was like, 'were you spotting or anything? No? Then why did they want the hcg done? ' I explained to her about my last menstrual period, and when I ovulated, and - wonders never cease - she believed me thatI ovulated on october 31st and adjusted my due date to July 22nd on my chart. :-D

Poor Matt has been so patient... I had to go to the hospital at 8 for the blood test, then to the doctor's office at 9 where we waited for 20 minutes, in to the ultrasound, back to the waiting room for 15 minutes, in to the nurse practitioner's room, then to stop and shop to buy diapers (we went to Walmart yesterday... and do you think I remembered that we needed diapers??), all in the pouring rain. He's such a good little man.


11/22/2005 :: Whoops!
None, or otherAmused
Well, my parents know. LOLOL!!! my mom was at my desk at work and she needed to email herself something, so she opened up outlook express (she does that all the time) and read an email from Christy saying that she was so happy that I got to see the yolk sac. hehehe!!! she called me and said, "you're pregnant?" and I was like "what?" she kept repeating, "you're pregnant?" and I kept saying "what?" LOL!! I was trying to stall her while I tried to figure out how the hell she knew!! She felt so horrible that she "ruined the surprise," poor thing. I kept telling her not to worry about it... I didn't know how I was going to be able to keep the secret from her until Christmas anyway. hehe! Her and my dad promised to keep the secret until we decide to tell everyone else.


11/25/2005 :: turkey day
Okay
I had an entire loooonnnggg entry for this day, but it got lost... so if this one's a little short and succinct, I apologize. ;) Mark and I decided that since my parents found out last week (my mom accidentally read an email that I wrote to Britt and Christy), that it was only fair to tell everyone else. So we told the rest of the family over Thanksgiving. They were all excited and surprised... and they all think it's a girl this time. I told my family by just kind of blurting it out, "I'm pregnant again!" lol.

Mark made the announcement to his family in this way: Michelle was talking about how her sister-in-law Christine (who is also pregnant again and due in May) is having a girl, according to the Chinese Gender Chart. Mark said, "so what do you think we're going to have?" Everyone was like, "What?" and looking at our faces (we were grinning like fools), and then it sank in and there was an explosion. lol.

Thanksgiving day itself was kind of half and half... it was nice in the morning - the last couple of years we've done thanksgiving at our house, but this year since our bathroom downstairs is currently under construction, we decided to have it at my mom's house instead. that meant that we got to relax and watch the parade in the morning, which is something I've always wanted to do with my children. Unfortunately, Matt didn't seem all that interested in the parade. hehe. oh well, there's always next year! The kind of stinky part of the day was that it snowed pretty heavily in the morning and my grandparents, uncle Tom and Uncle Bob & Aunt Nancy decided that the roads were too treachorous to come out and opted to stay home. I felt so bad for them - and for my parents - who had a 22 lb turkey for 6 people! But, as usual, we made the best of it, and had a good time anyway. And we got sent home with lots of leftovers. wink.

Okay, that catches us up to-date. From now until I run out of entries, I'll post the entries as they happened one year prior. :)